What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

whats green and slimy? green slim

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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