Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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