caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

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Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

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YOU

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

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What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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anti jokes are really funny

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops