- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Chuck Norris has appeared in several action films.

3 men walk into a bank. They rob the bank and kil 13 hostages.

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

what happend to Helen Keller when she fell in a hole She climed out of the hole

A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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