a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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