What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Superman cross the road? I dunno.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

how do you boil oil? add b to oil

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops