Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

YOU

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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