what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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