A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

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Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

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A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

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What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

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whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

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What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

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I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

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Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

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Jax vs Pig Jax: HOHAHOHOHAHOHAHOHA... Etc Pig *spinning head like neck is gonna break off* Shao Kahn: FINISH HIM! Jax: GOT YA! OH YEAH... BEASTIALI*Y, BEAST*ALITY? AGAIN?

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A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

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Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

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A convict is ripping out stop signs .. and a police comes out of no where and screams "What are you doing?!" The guys says Ripping up stop signs..

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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