Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

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A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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