What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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