What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

who's a knob,a liar, and systematically ruining a once well-run family football club by employing crooks , buying footballers who are well-passed there sell-out date and getting the team relegated ? steve kean not laughing ? nor are 23 ,000 others

REHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHAB

An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

Whats funny? Your face.

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

What did the blonde say when she saw a box of cheerios? "Lovely, I think I'll have some of these for breakfast today. The wholegrain will be good for me."

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

cool

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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