"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

What do you call a 2 storied house ? A dolphin! :D

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

why did reed eat a fish? He had cancer of the testicles

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

What is the best joke ever? 1D

hey justin

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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