I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

Knock knock. Its open.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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