A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

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lets bomb africa

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Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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An eagle and a mouse sat on a tree branch, watching a farmer walk to the pasture to milk his cows. The eagle then turned to the mouse but said nothing, because eagles cannot speak. The eagle then ate the mouse because it was a bird of prey.

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Jacob licked out his buthole again. It was becoming a usual thing for him to do, it suddenly became one of his hobbies and wanted to lick more, so he started licking MR. Macs

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Honk if you're Amish!

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Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

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what did the carrot say to the rabbit? stop eating me you son of a B*****

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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