what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

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A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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