You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

guess what>? your mum lol

A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

Knock, knock. Come in.

What's long and black? A long and black object.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...