why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

Gay rights.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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