Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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how do you make a baby stop crying? but hot coals down its throat

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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a

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

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69

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A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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