how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

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Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

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What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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