What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

Actual jokes are now obsolete.

Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

If God gives you lemons you find a new God

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.It is a very simple task for somebody who knows what to do.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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