Hats better than a stick? A stone

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

What's worse than the holocaust? The holocaust was one of the most terrible incidents in history there are very few things worse than.

Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

Tall asians

Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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