A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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White NBA players.

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Guess what? Random shit. Why? Because almost nobody looks at the newest jokes to realize that 99.999% of jokes that just say random shit never get above the 0 mark.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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how man

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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