What didn't the artist buy at Best Buy? A Ziploc Bag full of AIDs infested zebra pubes.

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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Yesterday, I was assasinated.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

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penis

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

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What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops