How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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1d

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-knock knock! -doors open

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Why did the black man die? He was shot

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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I recently found out I have aids just kiddin heres the real joke... I recenly found out that Philidelphia means "City of Brotherly Love" and I said so do people in philly say its always free hug day in Phillipd fun house in philly?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

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I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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whats funnier then a joke on anit jokes pracitcally anything cause anti jokes repaeats and everyone has herd them

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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