Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Equal rights!

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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