one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

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Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

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What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

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What happened to the young baby after her mother died It grew up got a collage degree and had a great life growing up with her dad and visiting the cemetery every year

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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For every person with a broken heart, there is another person out there with a stapler <3 And that person really needs to staple their math papers together so they can turn them in.

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops