What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

thumb_up thumb_down -17

i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Clyde: Hey John! :D John: Hey clyde! :D Clyde: :D! John: :D! Clyde: :D, :), :|, :(, D'X John: ? hey man, are you ok? Wtf is going on with you? Clyde: Man, it's not me... :'(... It's you... It's your... Your... John: My what? Clyde: YOUR FACE!!!! D'X

thumb_up thumb_down -17

whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops