Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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The other day I went to the holocaust museum and it was horrible No air conditioning or cold drinks

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

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-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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Why did the fox cross the road? To chew on the chicken carcass.

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What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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