Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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breasts

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops