A wise man once said, "I am wise".

You know what's funny? You got AIDs

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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