A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

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a horse walks into a bar. the barman asks "why the long face". not understanding human language, the horse takes a shit, neighs then leaves

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roses are red violets are pink your nanas in the cowfeild with a bottle of stink... not really shes long gone.

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Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

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whats worse than bitting into ur apple and finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just murded noddy and his family who were making a nice little home in there

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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