So this guy was making a sandwich...

what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

hashtags suck balls

why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

What's the difference between meat and fish? You can't beat your fish.

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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