why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

Whats do Hispanics and Blacks have in common? They are both stereo-typically defined and thus the subject of many popular jokes.

Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

So a bar walks into a man...

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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