If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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