What has two legs? Half a cat

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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Here's a joke The Holocaust.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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