What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

Eric is gay Ha

what are you mike bibby?

What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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