I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats green? Mountain Dew.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Hey. I came up with an anti-joke. I posted it here.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

thumb_up thumb_down +12

joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

thumb_up thumb_down +12

You: Why did hitler go to hell? Them: Why? You: You're an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

thumb_up thumb_down +12

KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops