Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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