Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

A Duck walks into a bar.

Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

Oh, right

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

the NAACP

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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