How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Denard Robinson

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

thumb_up thumb_down -45

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

You're welcome. On to the next house.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Rose are red, Violets are blue Your cat is dead Turkey

thumb_up thumb_down -63

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops