Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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race-car = rac-ecar

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What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

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How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

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What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops