If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they practice.

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

Why did the hispanic buy a pepsi? Because he was thirsty.

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

What did the boy say to his friend? nothing, they were both deaf

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

sucks Syntax...

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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