Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

Why did the old man die? He was old.

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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