Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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