Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

i have no freinds on facebook.... overated

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

One night a man layed on his bed and looked into the skies, then he realizes: WHERE THE HELL IS MY CEILING!?!?!

Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

A White guy, Black guy and Hispanic are all on the same bus. They get off at their predetermined stops and continue their day.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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