A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

i have no freinds on facebook.... overated

Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

A woman walks into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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