- Anti Joke

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

Knock Knock. Doors open

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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