Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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Your Mom is so fat she's Fat

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops