How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

Why did everyone want to hang out with the mushroom? They didn't. In fact the mushroom's social anxiety had developed to the stage that he had frequent contemplations of self-harm and is in serious need of extensive therapy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

numbers just make the funniest antijokes

ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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