How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

Women's Rights Movement

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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