why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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A guy walks into a bar

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All Bin Laden wanted was peace on earth and good will toward men.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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want more?

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Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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Women's rights

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What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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