There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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A black man walks out of a police station

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Whats worse then a dead baby? 10 dead babies

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some people say that i am gay they are right cause i like boys

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Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

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Where is Tampa Bay, Florida?

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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There was a cat and a copy cat. the regular cat jumped off a cliff. How many cats are left? 2 Cats have 9 lives!!!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops