Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops